Holding me steady...

I re-read Psalm 63...searching for the phrase that holds me

the words that push me to be what I'm not

Steady

And the thing is, before I can be steady-

there are those other words...

"I hold on to You for dear life"

And even when I think I am holding on for dear life,

obviously, I'm not...

because some days I feel anything but steady.

Some days when I lean too heavy into the unknowns of the future

when I feel a burden to say too much to someone who doesn't want to hear

when I carry deep a feeling that all is not right with those I love....

on those days

days like today...

I need a reminder to let go of what I'm carrying in my hands

and hold on to You for dear life...

And sometimes I have to repeat the words

even when I don't feel the words

Because I want to live the words 

and sometimes living just takes mental practice...

And so I repeat...

"God—you’re my God!

    I can’t get enough of you!

I've worked up such hunger and thirst for God,

    traveling across dry and weary deserts.

So here I am in the place of worship, eyes open,

    drinking in your strength and glory.

In your generous love I am really living at last!

    My lips brim praises like fountains.

I bless you every time I take a breath;

    My arms wave like banners of praise to you.

I eat my fill of prime rib and gravy;

    I smack my lips. It’s time to shout praises!

If I’m sleepless at midnight,

    I spend the hours in grateful reflection.

Because you've always stood up for me,

    I’m free to run and play.

I hold on to you for dear life,

    and you hold me steady as a post...'

Psalm 63