"I hold on to You for dear life, and you hold me steady as a post..." Psalm 63

Saturday, June 30, 2012

...

If you give a dog a bath towel,
She will do one of three things: 
she will lay on it
 she will ignore it
 or she will eat it

It doesn't matter why you gave it to her...
even if it was only to give her a soft place to sleep.
It doesn't matter, because she'll do whatever in the world she wants to do with it.

We found this out the hard way this week-
so I'm passing this tip on to you...
If you have an 8 month old, 45 pound Labrador Retriever in your house,
you may want to consider hiding all your towels
do what you want, but you've been warned

You may find out, like us, that your pup needs only a few minutes alone to devour the thing to shreds and ingest it deep into her stomach where it will lay 
and refuse to come back out...

In short, this is what might happen if you find yourself in the very same situation some day...

You, too, may find yourself cleaning up vomit all over the house,
and driving to the vet's office for a simple diagnosis...
only to find out there is nothing at all simple about the procedure
and before you know it, your chewing-princess is settled into a three nights stay at the Pet Spa

...and at the end of those three days, if the princess hasn't pooped the glob of towel and string out
you may find yourself signing your life away on a dotted line and giving the okay to perform a surgery, all the while knowing it's going to cost the equivalent of a small kingdom to pay it off.

And you may find that when you show up at the Vet's office just after the surgery, 
there will be two baggies filled with the gooey stomach remains - just for you

And your children will probably need therapy because you make them pose with those  remains...
 you'll have to admit, that your dog could win prizes for eating the stupidest things...
and refusing to poop them out.

And when you go to the back room to visit the patient, 
chances are she will greet you looking just like this...
all drugged up and wearing the cone of Shame
 and she'll probably try to escape so she can come home where she belongs...
 and just about the time you think things are about to go back to normal, 
the Vet will inform you that the surgery calls for a celebratory bland diet for 3 days.

If it happens to you, you'll be glad that someone knew how to help the princess out...
but when you're standing over the stove on the hottest day of the year making this
 and bagging them into meal-size proportions...
you might start to wonder how you got here.

And then you'll remember how quiet it was around your house without the four-legged K9...

and wish you could just start your week over
without the towel
and the payments that will be spread over several years...
but you'll be grateful when the ordeal is over 
and remind yourself that tomorrow is a new day...



2 comments:

Richard Sandberg said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Mrs.Rabe said...

We had a dog when the kids were little that ate a rope. Then when trying to poop it out just couldn't quite get it all out. So Tim step on the end of the rope (that was out) and made the dog run away from him and viola! It was all the way out!

Other than that our dogs have not been as crazy as Scarlett has been for you!

Deanna

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